Stitched in velvet cloth

“Get that perfect messed-up hair style. It just takes 10 minutes to get that tousled hair look”. 

You must be guessing today’s discussion is on hair style. 

I had written what is seen in Bangalore Times ( that colorful supplementary of Times of India ) today’s edition. I read that once in a while to tell myself that I am not that old. In fact I watched “Baby Doll” song from Ragini MMS 2 movie (not sure whether its an album), yesterday. Tried to watch it and saw it full. There was a caption at the beginning of the song “You are not too old”. I passed my “youngness” test. Though only part of lyric I remember is “Zandu Balm” somewhere. You may also try to check your fitness by trying to watch that song.

Now you must be guessing the topic today is “aging”. Keep guessing !

I went and stood in front of the mirror to see how tousled my hair style is. Not bad, the remaining few on the head are in a haphazard way as usual. But I could see more grey in those few ones. Yes, age is catching up with me.

I always try to forget my age, but can’t. I see grey hair on my head, I may see none in the near future as all the remaining will also fall. Before I recover from that shock, I get email on credit card statement. Password to be given to open the pdf is four letters of my name appended with my date of birth in DDMMYY format. Double shock, hefty payment due and age. I login to ICICIDIRECT to check how my stocks are doing. Password plus I should give PAN or Date of Birth. Tripple shock - crashed stocks, IT dues and again my age. Finally decided to write my blog( sundaresh1963.blogspot.com) My blog domain tells my year of birth, I myself had given that as domain with my name was not available. So appended my year of birth. Multiple shocks, as many as 49 number of shocks, (all my posts) in the blogspace and my age !

The more I try to forget my age, the more I am reminded of it.

Yes, your guess is right. I am going to talk about “forgetfulness” today.

Humans are blessed with two unique things. The ability to laugh and the ability to forget something that they remember most. You have seen politicians giving you tall promises and then forget. They have not forgotten. They have those fresh in their memory, to be used in same words or paraphrased for the next elections. And it is we who forget those promises when we vote him again, after seeing our roads getting tarred with 1 mm thick tar, 3 months before next elections.

In Mahabharata, Karna had to pay heavy price for his forgetfulness. Not that he deliberately did it. He was cursed by Parashu Rama, his guru , for hiding the truth from him that Karna was a Kshatriya. The curse was that Karna would forget his skills when he needed them most.

I have many forgetful incidents in my Purana too !

I had gone to manager to approve my travel. Somebody had told me that company would allow us to start the journey from home town - need not be Bangalore, so I wanted to fly COCHIN-CHENNAI-SINGAPORE. “No No, we do not allow such things” the manager lifted phone and consulted HR guy. HR team had forgotten to inform him of this new change. I got approval, went to Cochin to attend the festival at Cochin Thirumala Devsthana, our temple. Many events happen during that festival, two I don’t miss. The feast with coconut rich dishes gassi, valval, alchakarry ( these are unique preparations made by Konkani’s in Kerala ) is one. The second one is the procession on “Gold Garuda” chariot late in the night. That time Feast, Procession all over, next day I was supposed to fly out. I had forgotten to check the itinerary. I had seen the start date flying out from Chennai was correct. It remained correct but the departure time was 12:15 AM. The flight had already gone !

This below one is a fiction, told by one of my uncles.

“Emjee”, is the name of the hero, stout, round, short gentleman needless to say with a potbelly. He gets an underpants stitched in velvet cloth, that too very expensive cloth. To wear under his white dothi. ( people who don’t know what dothi is – it is the stuff our defense minster or finance minister normally wear instead of pants). 3 months pass by, Emjee thinks “ a few washes already over I need to show this costly underpants to people before its shining goes off”. That day Emjee sets out, in his dothi he folds it and ties above knee level to show a bit of that velvet stuff. Nobody is looking at it. He raises the dothi bit by bit till people start giving him a dirty look. Emjee presumes it is because of jealousy. He returns home, opens the gate, he finds what? “ his own velvet underpants hanging on the ropes after the third wash by his wife”.

Whether one is forgetful or not, he needs to keep one thing  in mind - if he tries to show off with bit of slight brilliance he possesses, he might be exposed, literally!

Forgive but never Forget. We all know this. But this is something I just cannot practice. My wife ( how can I forget my wife in this discussion on forgetfulness? ) does this well. The maid will be late as usual. She will be cursing her “Let her come today I will give my piece of mind. Are we also not giving her money? She is always late and moreover she does not do a good job at all”. Maid comes half an hour later than usual late time, looking totally tired. My wife sympathises “ Enamma meyyu usharillva?” ( are you not keeping well in Kannada). The maid will start the work even less enthusiastically. My wife forgives her but never forgets. Next day, she remembers everything and gets ready for next forgiving session.

If you are able to forgive without forgetting, that is great.

To me if somebody stabs or back stabs, either way stab is a stab and it inflicts wounds, I need to forget fully those stabs before I can forgive, healing the wounds alone will not help. My way of thinking is that in order to be sincere in forgiving somebody, one needs to forget what all had happened. I sincerely try to forget what had happened to forgive! I am not sure whether I am right or wrong.